Astros AL West Rivals: Five Reasons To Hate The Oakland A’s

Aug 8, 2014; Oakland, CA, USA; Oakland Athletics closing pitcher

Sean Doolittle

(62) celebrates with teammates after defeating the Minnesota Twins 6-5 at O.co Coliseum. Mandatory Credit: Lance Iversen-USA TODAY Sports

Reason #1:

Sean Doolittle beat out Jose Altuve in the first round of the Face of MLB race. Can you see Doolittle’s face in the photo above? I cannot place it behind the massive whisker infestation on his mug.

Unlike Dallas Keuchel‘s manscaped beard, Doolittle’s is wiry and unkempt. I’d be surprised if there were a real human underneath there and not a leprechaun masquerading as an MLB closer. How can you be the face of the entire league if no one can see your face?

Additionally, how a guy who has done little, as his name suggests, beats out the reigning American League batting champ is beyond me.

The A’s reliever later lost in the race to Buster Posey, but I think “Gigante” got robbed by a guy nicknamed “Doo.” Hate him, you must.

Next: Bash Brothers and Rickey

Jul 19, 2014; Oakland, CA, USA; Former Oakland Athletics manager

(10), and players

(34) and

(24) during the 1989 Oakland Athletics World Series team tribute before the game against the Baltimore Orioles at O.co Coliseum. Mandatory Credit: Bob Stanton-USA TODAY Sports

During the 1980s, the Oakland Athletics had some great teams, and they won their last World Series in 1989. They also had some of the biggest egos known to baseball on their roster. From the Bash Brothers to Rickey, the 80s A’s were hard to love if you weren’t a fan of theirs.

Reason #2

The Bash Brothers, Mark McGwire and Jose Canseco, were a formidable tandem back in the 1980s. They were feared for their home run bashing prowess and rightfully so. There was only one problem, as we later found out: these muscleheads were using PEDs. When Canseco’s Juiced hit the stands back in 2005, he and McGwire became the poster children for the PED era.

This is more than about just two baseball players, out of many, who use performance enhancers. It tainted a whole era of baseball and has even prevented some players, like Jeff Bagwell, from entering the Hall of Fame because of guilt by association. As the faces of the “juiced” era in baseball, we should hate the A’s for that.

Also, Jose Canseco is also a grade-A jerk.

Reason #3

Rickey Henderson is the best base stealer of all time. If you don’t believe me, just ask Rickey (watch the steal, then skip ahead to the 6:10 mark).

Rickey was fast, and Rickey could run, but humility is not in his DNA. He also liked to refer to himself in the third-person.

Next: Irony

May 20, 2014; St. Petersburg, FL, USA; Oakland Athletics hat and glove lays in the dugout against the Tampa Bay Rays at Tropicana Field. Mandatory Credit: Kim Klement-USA TODAY Sports

Reason #4:

Irony is good in literature, television shows, or politics. It makes things interesting and adds a layer of depth below what is seen on the surface of an issue.

Irony in real life, not so much. Like a hipster who wears terrible 80s fashions or high schoolers who attend the dance and make fun of their classmates who are enjoying themselves, irony can also be pretty annoying.

As for the Oakland A’s irony, it is funny and annoying – they wear the color of money but try to build a successful ball club as cheaply as possible (they are consistently in the bottom 10 in all of MLB). It may not be blatant, but it’s false advertisement: it’s the front office who should be wearing the green and gold.

Truly, it’s hard to believe they even pay someone to dye their uniforms. Why not just go with off white and dirty grey? Colors don’t make the team; cheap, undervalued players do.

Next: Moneyball

Reason #5:

Perhaps the number one reason you should hate the Oakland A’s is that as long as Jeff Luhnow is the GM of the Astros, his approach to team-building will always be linked to Billy Beane’s “Moneyball.” Beane may be the guy who made analytics famous in the baseball world, but for heaven’s sakes, these comparisons need to stop. These are two different men with two different approaches that both happen to employ analytics for their decision-making.

The Astros and the A’s – the same (according to some), but they are really different.

These Oakland A’s will be hard to beat. In the tough AL West, the Astros need to have a great season series against them as they try to climb out of the basement. This series could decide the third place winner in the division. There’s no better time than now to start hating them.

Next: Will Harris is Streaking

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